“I always thought … I can love the trauma out of them,” says Gina Costa.
Gina is married to Damian Costa, and together they have six children – three in which they fostered and adopted as their own. Together, the two are figuring out the special set of challenges it takes to raise children who were raised in foster care.
But, what is it about raising foster children that is so different from raising biological children?
Approximately 3000 children end up in foster care on any given day in Clark County. More than half the time, those children get separated from their own siblings which can be very traumatic for them. That, plus experiencing abuse, neglect, and placement trauma can deeply affect a foster child’s development.
Dr. Bree Mullin, a licensed psychologist in Nevada, says that this trauma can manifest in children in many different ways like through anxiety, depression, and aggression – things that Damian and Gina have seen themselves. They’ve even seen it in one of their girls who was only three months old when she was adopted.
“You know, kids who experience trauma, it causes significant nervous system arousal, and they go into full fight or flight mode,” says Dr. Mullin. “And they're in fight or flight mode almost all the time, and that can just be exhausting for kids.”
Clark County is urgently looking for more foster volunteers. With a lack of resources, Damian and Gina helped start Foster in Faith, a non-profit organization with a goal to provide help and resources for those looking to become foster parents.
“To be a foster parent, you just have to have the willingness to see the outcome,” he says. “It is never about being a perfect person or raising a perfect child. It is about dealing or helping deal with the situation in front of us as it is, and helping them get to the best place that they can.”
